The biggest change you can make in your life that will set you on the path to simplifying is
Changing Your Mindset
When I was newly married almost 20 years ago, my sister taught me a very important lesson.
What that means is that we have to change our own expectations rather than actually try to change others. Let me give you a few examples…
The first is how this relates to the people in our lives. Let’s face it, nobody is perfect and at one time or another other people will get on our nerves. Whether it’s your husband, your children, family, or friends there are likely people in your life that cause you to get emotionally upset.
Do you get upset because a friend or your husband constantly shows up later than you expect them to? Then just expect the fact that they don’t run on the same strict time clock as you do and plan on them being an hour later. If they show up after thirty minutes… well… what a happy surprise.
If your kids don’t clean their rooms or make their beds everyday the way you’d like them to, then close their bedroom door and accept the fact that they like their room the way it is. My daughter actually asks me not to remove her pile of clothes from the giant bean bag in her room. She knows exactly where everything is and what’s clean. While I like everything folded and neatly put in its place, she’s not me and I have to accept that.
If you’re truly working to simplify your life, it’s important that you also simplify your mind. Accept people for who they are. Accept the fact that they will make different decisions than you or go about a project in a different manner than you. Don’t expect them to be like you.
We cannot expect others to change. Instead we need to change our own expectations. Doing so will help you relax, let go of frustration easier, and live a happier, more peaceful, more simple life.
Like that day 5 post!
Sorry, it was day 4 i meant to say.
Thanks. It was a valuable lesson that’s gotten me through alot over the years.
Hi there and thanks for the encouragement. I totally get what you’re saying.. all about where our head’s are.. applying my energy to consciously set priorities … streaming when possible.. realizing, as much responsibity as I assign myself for everything that happens all around me, I’m not, and it’s probably better that way!
My question is what is something one of my kid’s doing (i.e. choosing to live in a very messy room rather than clean it up) is actually making more work and more crazy in my life? (i.e. he never has clean laundry to wear to go to school in the morning?
Ty,
~Laura
It may be a matter of baby steps. Placing one small basket in their room and let them know you’re happy to keep up with the dirty laundry they place in the basket, but will respect the rest of their space and not touch it. Or, my daughter learned how to do her own laundry. She likes keeping her clothes separate from the rest of the family and is perfectly happy washing her own clothes every third day or so.